Last night's journal entry (verbatim)
So two huge things happened to me recently that I had been fearing for some time. I was so afraid that if these things happened, I would lose control. I did. I have. Holy cow, it's not as bad as I thought it would be!When the first thing went wrong, I cried. I started to fear. But then I told people about it. I told those I trusted most. I asked them to pray for me. Then, I took it to Christ. I prayed. I meditated. I took a shower. I made new friends, etc.
I have no control over what happens next. I haven't the slightest clue what will happen next. This is glorious!
For a long time now, I've been aching for the Lord to touch me in a real way. I am such a touchy person. I love hugs. I like holding hands. I like to cuddle. I have been hungry for a touch like this from the Lord. I got some. I had a real hug from the Lord! I felt his touch. I understood it in my mind. He held me for a while and then kissed my forehead. I am so happy. I've always wanted to experience something like this; not just say that its possible, but have real experience to back it up with.
I will get through this- I have to. Can it be easier than I thought? Who says it always has to be hard? Can the grace of God really get us through an othwerwise difficult situation with little pain? I think so.
Lord I praisee and thank you for the grace you've given me. I choose full acceptance of this grace and ask for it to continue. Please speak to me through your word and through the Holy Spirit. I will choose to walk in light by faith. I choose to accept where I am at with my job and watch for opening doors. I choose to lay my dreams down at your feet. Thank you for taking them! I choose to leave congrol over my relationships in your hands. I will step out in faith with this move. Thank you for the forgiveness that I've received of my sin. I confess daily. Please put prayer on my heart for others.
Amen.
posted by CarGate @ 9:09 AM
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